"We don't become kings or queens when coronated." There's a weird sense of fondness in the way she says princess though, which makes him think the simplicity of it is something she might like.
He wonders if she's waiting for him to settle in, so Cassian takes the plunge and lowers himself backwards, pulling the blankets up as he lays down. He's on his back, which seems the least threatening when the alternatives are facing her and facing away from her.
"It's not terribly uncommon for spouses to keep their own rooms anyway, despite that assumption," he notes idly. As though they are not, by technicality, sharing right now. Royal marriages are weird. "But that is the intent of the master bedroom, as it were."
She does like the simplicity. It seems so much more down to earth. Her mother had hated being gueen, Jyn remembers the way she would roll her eyes when the nobles had their backs turned, making Jyn stifle laughter against her mother's skirts. And it didn't seem fair, that Mama could be a queen but Papa couldn't be a king.
Cassian is Fest's prince, sure, but Jyn is his princess and she likes that.
"My parents shared. When I was small I used to sleep between them, Papa took to making me a little nest at the foot of the bed so I wouldn't take up the entire middle of the bed." She sinks down a little, wriggling under the blankets in increments. First her feet, then her legs, curling the blanket over her hips, slowly tucking herself in. It's not until she's laying down, curled on her side with part of the blankets gathered in front of her like a teddy bear, that she quietly adds: "I never thought I'd ever be married."
He's secretly glad the Festian titles don't go beyond that. He can't imagine being called King Cassian for the rest of his life, especially when he hasn't even lived in Fest his whole life.
He tilts his head towards her when she starts talking about her parents, glad for the way she burrows further into bed. She really needs to sleep. "My parents shared too." His brow pinches, like he's thinking and maybe not sure how true the memory is. "My mother used to let me sleep with them whenever I wanted. Sometimes she'd take me in there on her own."
But oh. It's so quiet, he almost misses her tiny confession, and his heart sinks a little bit. "I hope it's not all bad, so far." There's a pause, and his voice is just as quiet. "Did you ever want to be?"
"It..." She puffs out a sigh, shaking her head. "I was so small when we arrived in Lah'mu, I only had my parents for years. Whatever duties I had to Aria Prime weren't important. When Mama--" Jyn swallows past the pressure in her chest, lingering from the nightmare. "When Saw found me, any life I would have lived was over."
There was no point to marriage in the Partisans, no strategy or reason behind it except love, but Jyn had never witnessed that.
"I don't think it was ever something that occurred to me before, honestly." Her dolls didn't even get married, preferring solo adventures. "I knew it existed, of course, but there would never be any cause for it in my life. I was never going to be a princess, much less a queen."
When Mama - she says, cutting herself off, and Cassian knows Jyn was dreaming about her mother. It makes him want to take her hand, or tug her in, because the familiar ache of missing his mother isn't always buried like he hopes.
"I didn't mean out of duty." Though he supposes she answered that part too, in saying it never really crossed her mind at all. He really does feel sorry she was pulled into this. "My parents were lucky to be in love when they married. I suppose it was easier before the Empire. I always knew I would be married one day, but I also always knew it would be something to help Fest more than a choice."
What's strange is that he's telling her. Like she's a friend. And he supposes she is, given how quickly he'd grown to be more comfortable around her than most other people. He tries for something a little lighter and no less true. "But it's not so bad, so far."
"No, it's not," Jyn agrees, weak smile touching her features before it twists into a frown again as something occurs to her. Her mouth opens to ask a question and snaps shut again almost immediately. Maybe... that's for later. She makes a mental note to think about that later.
She huffs another sigh.
"It's just a lot to... get used to. But it isn't so bad with you, no." The smile flutters back, softer, almost shy. "I like Fest. It's freezing, but I like it here."
He doesn't miss the slip of a frown, and while he's curious, he's not going to ask. She's got too much to worry about already.
Besides, she agrees that it's not so bad with him. It makes him feel like they can handle it, makes him feel happier and more at ease. And she likes Fest. He's so stupidly pleased she likes his home, and a smile blooms on his own face, quiet and subdued, but it still softens his features. "I think we're adapting well, all things considered. I warned you it was cold but - I'm glad you like it here anyway."
She was right the day they met -- he should smile more. It always makes Jyn feel reassured when he smiles. It's an unfair situation for the both of them, but she trusts that he will try to make it work with her as long as she's necessary. She doesn't know if it will last, but.
Saw came back, maybe things are changing for her.
"Have you heard if Melshi's ribs have healed yet? Is he still cross with me?" The teasing note in her voice makes it clear she thinks Melshi's being a baby about it.
He feels like he's smiled more around Jyn than he has around most other people. Something about her makes it easier to be himself. They were both pulled into this without choice but - he likes her. It really isn't bad at all, and they're on the same page about a lot of things.
Cassian snorts at her teasing. "Between you and me, I think he's a little impressed, but don't be surprised if he watches you closely for a bit. They're mostly healed now, he'll be back in the field soon."
"Good. Round two." It's with that that she find settles under the blankets completely. Like the knowledge that she hasn't done irreparable harm makes her feel better, but she's also clearly smug as hell that she is the cause for Melshi's convalescence.
Of course it's the talk of punching that settles her. It only makes sense. But he's glad for the distraction from her dreams, so sorry about your life Melshi, he's gonna help her drag you.
"We are trained to fight. Melshi just made the mistake of underestimating you, whether from your size or because you were a prisoner. Maybe both. If you do ask him for round two, I'm sure he will agree."
Her eyebrows jump up, considering. She knows Melshi thought she was a little boy, not a very angry adult woman, of course he underestimated her. She doesn't, however, think he'll stop underestimating her now that the whole of the Alliance knows she is definitely a woman.
"Would you?" Agree to fight with her, underestimate her, it's really up to him, but Jyn personally wants to know if he'd be willing to spar with his brand new wife.
He is maybe a little taken aback initially, but when he thinks about it, it's not really a surprise.
"I don't underestimate anyone." Because in his line of spy work, anyone can kill you. "You want to spar with me?" That is more or less what she's asking he's pretty sure, but he's going to clarify, to give himself more time to answer.
It's not necessarily a no. It's definitely unusual and Draven would probably have a conniption, which honestly makes him want to say yes more than anything else.
She could explain that she's heard so much about him from his people, but especially from the maids who lace her up in the mornings and try to coax her into brushing her hair while they drink tea on her bed because she won't take much help but she won't send them away because they enjoy the relaxing break gossiping about their prince. They're unendingly loyal to him and quite sweet, but they didn't hesitate even a moment before telling Jyn about when, where, and how Cassian worked out and that if you stood perfectly still in one particular spot you could spy on the rebel calisthenics without being noticed.
Actually maybe she should tell him that the maids know everything. Maybe after he answers her.
"I'm your wife, no one else is going to spar with me and Bodhi needs loads more practice to be up to par."
Cassian is still a spy even though he's also a prince, and he is very aware sometimes of the way his and the rebels' training is watched. It doesn't bother him much, mostly because sometimes it even motivates people to join. The gossip is never going to stop, and it's useful now and then at any rate.
He can hear Draven's disagreement, but Cassian wants a friend, not an awkwardness. "We can," he says, imagining Draven's scowl and almost smiling. "You're more than welcome to join the rest of the training that happens here too, as is Bodhi. Princess Leia herself has gone through some rigorous training. Not everyone likes it when their royals learn to fight, but not everyone makes the rules."
"I don't need to learn to fight," she reminds him, though it doesn't sound like she doesn't think she could use work or a refresher course or that she won't happily throw herself into learning different techniques and angles and styles. Even in the dim firelight, her eyes are sparkling with anticipation.
Training was her life with Saw and, frankly, that's what she misses the most.
She has nothing to do on Fest, it feels like, because all she is is Cassian's Wife and she's never wanted to be relegated to someone that just belonged to someone else -- even if she knows that that is not how Cassian feels about it. She'll even fight in a bloody dress, if she has to.
"You know the maids spy on you, right? Particularly when you're training. They're quite fond of watching you train."
"I didn't say you needed to," he says carefully, watching how she immediately latches onto the idea anyway. "But I like to keep up with it, like exercise."
And once Jyn proves she's capable, he's sure there are some rebels who won't care that she's his wife. They stopped putting so much stock in his being their prince, at least in the sense of no longer being afraid to spar with him. It may have taken some time, but he got there!
Her reveal has him exhaling a sigh though. "Yes, I know. It's pointless to stop them. Have they said something to you?"
"They say a lot of things to me." The maids are very loquacious when it comes to their new princess, especially when it comes to (what Jyn assumes is supposed to be) subtly pushing the prince and princess together.
She doesn't offer anything else they may say to her however.
Satisfied that she can at least keep up her training, her eyes finally close, burrowing deeper under the covers and mashing her head in a very unladylike manner into the pillow, long curls spreading across the pillow like an oil spill.
He can imagine the sorts of things they say to Jyn, that it doesn't surprise him she doesn't elaborate. They're definitely not at that point.
"It doesn't make you uncomfortable, does it?" Because really, that's the ultimate concern here! He's sure Jyn wouldn't put up with anything she doesn't want to, but he already knows her maids are quite fond of her and maybe she might like them enough to be worried about them in return if they went too far -
He's overthinking this, clearly, but his brain is already stuck on look after Jyn since he heard her screaming. Even if she looks far better now, smashing her face into the pillow.
Her head shakes, still smooshed into the pillow, eyes still closed.
"No." He is definitely overthinking it, she's quite capable to throwing a pillow at them when they go a little too far. Wriggling, she gathers more of the blankets around her, building up a pile around her like a little nest.
"Would you--" She stops before she can finish the sentence, shaking her head again.
Not that he thought it would be a yes, but Cassian is relieved anyway when she says no. He settles in a little more comfortably himself, pulling up the blankets higher and tighter, though not quite the nest Jyn is building.
He tilts his head to look at her, even though her face is still half buried in the pillow. "Would I what?"
It's half muffled into the pillow, but not enough to disguise what she asked. She doesn't want to be alone and she knows Cassian is there, of course she knows, but it's a rather large bed and she doesn't want to wake up again imagining she's all alone in the cave.
She almost sound apologetic because she can tell he's getting comfortable and she's asking him to move around again.
Oh. He's not sure what he expected her to ask, but it wasn't that. His breath stills for a moment while his brain reassures him he heard correctly, and it's on the tip of his tongue to ask her if she's sure, but she wouldn't have said it in the first place if she didn't really want it. Jyn doesn't ask for this sort of thing often, if at all.
Instead of answering her, he just - moves. He shifts himself a few inches closer. Not near enough to touch her outright, he's too good mannered for that, but close enough that their legs could brush in the night, depending on how she sprawls. His tone is quiet. "Is this okay?"
A huff of a breath and a little, pillow stifled nod are her answer, eyes opening slowly to peer at him. He is closer. Close enough to touch if she stretched out her hand but she does no such thing, burying herself even deeper under the blankets. It's like she wants the bed to swallow her up.
He meets her eyes when she opens them and for two seconds feels like he was caught with his hand in a cookie jar, but he just offers her a careful sort of smile. He did what she asked, she's even grateful.
She speaks! "Of course." Now that she is happy, Cassian burrows back comfortably under the blankets, not nearly as hidden as her, but still snuggled in because it's still cold. He's pretty sure she, however, is going to disappear entirely soon. "I hope you sleep better now, Jyn."
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ohnofeelstho2017-06-16 12:11 am
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He wonders if she's waiting for him to settle in, so Cassian takes the plunge and lowers himself backwards, pulling the blankets up as he lays down. He's on his back, which seems the least threatening when the alternatives are facing her and facing away from her.
"It's not terribly uncommon for spouses to keep their own rooms anyway, despite that assumption," he notes idly. As though they are not, by technicality, sharing right now. Royal marriages are weird. "But that is the intent of the master bedroom, as it were."
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Cassian is Fest's prince, sure, but Jyn is his princess and she likes that.
"My parents shared. When I was small I used to sleep between them, Papa took to making me a little nest at the foot of the bed so I wouldn't take up the entire middle of the bed." She sinks down a little, wriggling under the blankets in increments. First her feet, then her legs, curling the blanket over her hips, slowly tucking herself in. It's not until she's laying down, curled on her side with part of the blankets gathered in front of her like a teddy bear, that she quietly adds: "I never thought I'd ever be married."
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He tilts his head towards her when she starts talking about her parents, glad for the way she burrows further into bed. She really needs to sleep. "My parents shared too." His brow pinches, like he's thinking and maybe not sure how true the memory is. "My mother used to let me sleep with them whenever I wanted. Sometimes she'd take me in there on her own."
But oh. It's so quiet, he almost misses her tiny confession, and his heart sinks a little bit. "I hope it's not all bad, so far." There's a pause, and his voice is just as quiet. "Did you ever want to be?"
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There was no point to marriage in the Partisans, no strategy or reason behind it except love, but Jyn had never witnessed that.
"I don't think it was ever something that occurred to me before, honestly." Her dolls didn't even get married, preferring solo adventures. "I knew it existed, of course, but there would never be any cause for it in my life. I was never going to be a princess, much less a queen."
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"I didn't mean out of duty." Though he supposes she answered that part too, in saying it never really crossed her mind at all. He really does feel sorry she was pulled into this. "My parents were lucky to be in love when they married. I suppose it was easier before the Empire. I always knew I would be married one day, but I also always knew it would be something to help Fest more than a choice."
What's strange is that he's telling her. Like she's a friend. And he supposes she is, given how quickly he'd grown to be more comfortable around her than most other people. He tries for something a little lighter and no less true. "But it's not so bad, so far."
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She huffs another sigh.
"It's just a lot to... get used to. But it isn't so bad with you, no." The smile flutters back, softer, almost shy. "I like Fest. It's freezing, but I like it here."
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Besides, she agrees that it's not so bad with him. It makes him feel like they can handle it, makes him feel happier and more at ease. And she likes Fest. He's so stupidly pleased she likes his home, and a smile blooms on his own face, quiet and subdued, but it still softens his features. "I think we're adapting well, all things considered. I warned you it was cold but - I'm glad you like it here anyway."
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Saw came back, maybe things are changing for her.
"Have you heard if Melshi's ribs have healed yet? Is he still cross with me?" The teasing note in her voice makes it clear she thinks Melshi's being a baby about it.
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Cassian snorts at her teasing. "Between you and me, I think he's a little impressed, but don't be surprised if he watches you closely for a bit. They're mostly healed now, he'll be back in the field soon."
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"Your Alliance needs to learn how to fight."
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"We are trained to fight. Melshi just made the mistake of underestimating you, whether from your size or because you were a prisoner. Maybe both. If you do ask him for round two, I'm sure he will agree."
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"Would you?" Agree to fight with her, underestimate her, it's really up to him, but Jyn personally wants to know if he'd be willing to spar with his brand new wife.
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"I don't underestimate anyone." Because in his line of spy work, anyone can kill you. "You want to spar with me?" That is more or less what she's asking he's pretty sure, but he's going to clarify, to give himself more time to answer.
It's not necessarily a no. It's definitely unusual and Draven would probably have a conniption, which honestly makes him want to say yes more than anything else.
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She could explain that she's heard so much about him from his people, but especially from the maids who lace her up in the mornings and try to coax her into brushing her hair while they drink tea on her bed because she won't take much help but she won't send them away because they enjoy the relaxing break gossiping about their prince. They're unendingly loyal to him and quite sweet, but they didn't hesitate even a moment before telling Jyn about when, where, and how Cassian worked out and that if you stood perfectly still in one particular spot you could spy on the rebel calisthenics without being noticed.
Actually maybe she should tell him that the maids know everything. Maybe after he answers her.
"I'm your wife, no one else is going to spar with me and Bodhi needs loads more practice to be up to par."
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He can hear Draven's disagreement, but Cassian wants a friend, not an awkwardness. "We can," he says, imagining Draven's scowl and almost smiling. "You're more than welcome to join the rest of the training that happens here too, as is Bodhi. Princess Leia herself has gone through some rigorous training. Not everyone likes it when their royals learn to fight, but not everyone makes the rules."
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Training was her life with Saw and, frankly, that's what she misses the most.
She has nothing to do on Fest, it feels like, because all she is is Cassian's Wife and she's never wanted to be relegated to someone that just belonged to someone else -- even if she knows that that is not how Cassian feels about it. She'll even fight in a bloody dress, if she has to.
"You know the maids spy on you, right? Particularly when you're training. They're quite fond of watching you train."
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And once Jyn proves she's capable, he's sure there are some rebels who won't care that she's his wife. They stopped putting so much stock in his being their prince, at least in the sense of no longer being afraid to spar with him. It may have taken some time, but he got there!
Her reveal has him exhaling a sigh though. "Yes, I know. It's pointless to stop them. Have they said something to you?"
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She doesn't offer anything else they may say to her however.
Satisfied that she can at least keep up her training, her eyes finally close, burrowing deeper under the covers and mashing her head in a very unladylike manner into the pillow, long curls spreading across the pillow like an oil spill.
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"It doesn't make you uncomfortable, does it?" Because really, that's the ultimate concern here! He's sure Jyn wouldn't put up with anything she doesn't want to, but he already knows her maids are quite fond of her and maybe she might like them enough to be worried about them in return if they went too far -
He's overthinking this, clearly, but his brain is already stuck on look after Jyn since he heard her screaming. Even if she looks far better now, smashing her face into the pillow.
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"No." He is definitely overthinking it, she's quite capable to throwing a pillow at them when they go a little too far. Wriggling, she gathers more of the blankets around her, building up a pile around her like a little nest.
"Would you--" She stops before she can finish the sentence, shaking her head again.
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He tilts his head to look at her, even though her face is still half buried in the pillow. "Would I what?"
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It's half muffled into the pillow, but not enough to disguise what she asked. She doesn't want to be alone and she knows Cassian is there, of course she knows, but it's a rather large bed and she doesn't want to wake up again imagining she's all alone in the cave.
She almost sound apologetic because she can tell he's getting comfortable and she's asking him to move around again.
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Instead of answering her, he just - moves. He shifts himself a few inches closer. Not near enough to touch her outright, he's too good mannered for that, but close enough that their legs could brush in the night, depending on how she sprawls. His tone is quiet. "Is this okay?"
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"Yes, thank you." Ah, words.
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She speaks! "Of course." Now that she is happy, Cassian burrows back comfortably under the blankets, not nearly as hidden as her, but still snuggled in because it's still cold. He's pretty sure she, however, is going to disappear entirely soon. "I hope you sleep better now, Jyn."
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