Which she knows will make that smile probably vanish but oh well. She should really go back and sit with him, but she likes the window and so instead of moving back to him, she moves forward and perches on the window seat, half facing him but still able to look out the window at Alderaan's countryside.
Compromise.
"What are you expecting from this? And don't say nothing. You've been expecting this since you were ten. What do you want from a marriage?"
His smile doesn't disappear immediately, but he does freeze first, slowly slipping away from his face with what might be a kind of shyness. She adjusts the way she's sitting, and he appreciates it. It makes it feel more like a conversation when she's actually looking at him.
Her question hangs in the air for a few moments while he thinks. He appreciates her candor too. Neither of them have any sort of romantic notions, and it helps him deal with it, weirdly.
"I always hoped that at the very least I would have a friend. Someone to have my back."
Which sounds a little silly to admit aloud. But it's not like Cassian has a lot of real friends. K2 is the guard he doesn't need, and they're friendly, but it always felt like something born more out of an obligation.
But if he needed to marry for politics, he always wanted to get along with his spouse. "What would you want?"
More wishful thinking than the idea of marrying for love if she's honest.
"When we were in hiding Mama didn't care about titles or... anything. Saw didn't have very many rules. I was on my own for five years." After a moment her mouth turns down into a frown, almost a pout, eyebrows knitting together before she breathes out a laugh sharpened with lingering bitterness. "Six. Six years. I forgot my birthday."
She takes a deep breath, pushes it out slowly. "Anyway, it's irrelevant." Irrelevant when it's what she wants, but not when it comes to Cassian's wants. His at least are attainable. "I can try to be your friend."
His brows furrow a little, because it seems counterproductive to apply the word freedom to an arranged marriage. It's exactly what the Alliance is fighting for, but Cassian has felt locked into his own position for so long, he almost forgot.
Her idea of few rules and shucking manners is, if he's honest, kind of appealing. "No, not irrelevant. We don't stop having these wants just because we've had some choices taken away."
'Some choices' is a mild way of putting a marriage, but he digresses. "You may have noticed Alderaan breathes the regalia. Fest is not this way. You will have more breathing room there than here."
He sighs a little. When they get to Fest, she'll know more about what he does too. "It may be easier on us both, if we tried to be friends."
Her eyebrows lift, expression quietly disbelieving. The Alliance is forcing them into an arranged marriage to secure her adoptive father's help, she doesn't see any freedom in that. "No one will be watching us from the crack in the door?"
SHE SEES YOU, THERE.
"Will you come sit with me?" Jyn knows how to make privacy. Her spot is the farthest from the door and the side she stretches forward to pat is half obscured but the thick, opulent curtains.
There's a muffled voice from the other side of the door, flat and almost robotic. "It's my job."
Cassian exhales. He didn't forget K2 was probably out there, but sometimes it's nice to pretend he does leave. "K2 is - an unusual case." Though it's definitely not helping him convince her Fest is different from Alderaan.
Something in her tone has him glancing at the couch, and he notices the privacy of it. He doesn't know if he should be suspicious or curious, or both. He nods anyway, climbing to his feet. "If you wish."
He sits neatly at the side she gestured towards, shooting her a more curious than suspicious look.
No, it's not helping, but his surly response -- K2, not Cassian -- almost makes a smile flicker across her expression.
She doesn't draw her legs back to her side and she's tempted to see how far she can push him when it comes to impropriety before he will push back. Instead she stretches her legs further, pressing her (freezing) toes against his thigh.
"Will you tell me more about Fest?" Not as cold as Hoth and snowy doesn't really say much and she's a curious creature by nature, she wants to know more about where she is saying, but she also wants to know more about where this Captain Prince is from. Even if it's in name only, she'll still be Fest's princess once they're married.
He stiffens when she touches him, though it's very subtle. She can probably tell, but he's ignoring it. Even through his pants, her feet are cold, and really she should at least put socks on if she's freezing.
"It's very small. Strategically important to the Alliance, but not a powerhouse. Our military is - also small." And primarily focused on intelligence, but he will get to that later, probably. It feels weird to talk about to a stranger, even if it's a stranger he's going to marry. "Most people are bilingual, you won't have any issues communicating."
He assumes she doesn't speak Festian. Not when she doesn't even know much about it yet.
She can feel the tension beneath her feet, but she doesn't pull away, ignoring it instead as her eyes gaze out the window, hand idly lifting to paint delicate swirls across the glass. In Fest, she assumes, she'll have all sorts of foggy windows to entertain herself with.
"I can learn, though nothing you said is anything that really interests me." She doesn't care about strategic importance to the Alliance, that is what got her into this mess in the first place. She doesn't want to care about strategy or militaries anymore, she'd left that behind when it had left her behind.
"What are the people like? What do you do for fun, what sort of animals live there, are there plants that somehow survive the harsh weather, what is the food like?" Her expression doesn't soften, but her semi-permanent frown seems less somber. "I want to know about life on Fest."
He frowns when she dismisses what he says, refusing to take it quite so personally - but her immediate follow up turns the frown into surprise.
No one ever really asks him about the people. It's usually about geography, about strategy, about Fest's resources. It's a burst of curiosity out of her that makes the air feel a little lighter, makes them both seem a little less grumpy.
"Is there a question I should answer first?" It's not quite teasing, but maybe it is. He looks over at her staring at the window. "There probably isn't a day that goes by when you will not see at least one person sledding. I could say it was only children, but that would be a lie. The food can be very spicy. Fest imports a lot of hot peppers. The snow makes it difficult to grow for ourselves, but it doesn't stop greenhouses from trying. Everyone always says we like our food to be so hot because it never quite stops being cold."
There are children there, interest flares behind her eyes briefly, fading but not leaving as he continues.
Spicy food for the warmth is an almost sweet idea. She can imagine parents making their children hot foods when they bound in from sledding, shaking snow off their clothes. Wrea was admittedly chilly, but it didn't know as long as Jyn had been on the craggy island.
Maybe it was too close to the water?
"I'm afraid I don't know what sledding is?" She doesn't want to tell him she's not sure she can handle spicy food but she subsisted off prison sludge for so many months she's not sure she can handle any food right now. Actually... "Do you think it would be an abuse of my power to have food brought here?"
He would ask why she thought there wouldn't be children, but he's been to places with very low numbers of them.
Cassian blinks a few times, because how could she not know what sledding is but - it's stupid to belittle her for it. She's never seen real snow before, it makes sense. "You slide on the snow. Sleds can be virtually anything from a thin metal sheet, to a wooden one, to something elevated on bars -" He makes a face, because describing sleds is weird, "- there's all kinds. You sit on them to slide down snow hills."
Now he wants to go sledding. He hasn't been in years.
Sleds sound weird. She doesn't get the appeal of it, but she's sure there must be something. Eventually she'll find out, she expects.
"Yes, to this room." Her nose crinkles a little. "I suppose I could go to the food, if that's easier. I don't relish walking around looking done up like some kind of bloody snow princess though."
As if she is not... a princess...
LOOK. She prefers pants. She doesn't want to put shoes on. She especially doesn't want to put shoes on that match this absurd dress because she can only imagine how uncomfortable they will be.
He sighs a little. "I'm sure someone thought they were being funny. The formalities of a first meeting." He hates wearing stiff clothes, but he can only imagine what it must be like for Jyn to be shoved into this dress, given the state they found her in. She is clearly uncomfortable in it. "I'm afraid most of the attire until the wedding will be similar."
He is not looking forward to the fancy dress for the next few days either.
"We can probably call for something, if you don't want to walk like this. Do you have a favorite thing to eat? K2 can probably go get it, if you'd rather."
The real point of that option is to get rid of the watchdog for a little while, but if she'd rather go to the kitchens herself, that's fine too. He gets the sense she's savvy enough to pick up on the choices.
"Broth, please." She can just feel the disdain that is going to roll off Cassian's guard dog when he's asked to fetch her food. The request is so pathetic that she feels like she has to elaborate.
"I haven't eaten since..." Her eyebrows knit together which is enough of an answer that it has been too long. "Prison doesn't particularly care about getting dinner to you on time."
Someone probably should have noticed when they were shoving her into this ridiculous get up, as a joke apparently!, but no one had offered and Jyn had been too pissed off to really notice until now -- when she is calm. The calm doesn't lessen how uncomfortable she feels admitting anything from prison, however, even if it makes her mildly grateful the women had chosen long sleeves for her.
He frowns, but not at Jyn. "Not one person asked if you were hungry?" Alderaan is usually better than that. She must be starving and it kind of irritates him; they knew she was in prison, that's where they found her. "K2!"
Within seconds the door opens and K2 walks in, looking huffy and as though he's trying very hard not to cross his arms. "I heard," he says with more huff, and Cassian is fairly sure he's going to blow himself away.
"Two, please. Something mild with vegetables for now. I'll make it up to you."
While something like chicken or beef would probably be far better, he's sure Jyn's stomach will appreciate being eased back into real food more slowly.
"They were... busy." She does not wake up like this, it took a lot of effort to make her look presentable, much less pretty. She doesn't know why she's bothering to defend people she doesn't really give a shit about, but she finds she doesn't...
want Cassian to make that face.
She looks away from the window finally, studying K2. "Thank you." Man, he does not like her.
"This is Alderaan. They are not understaffed." Bail must not have known either. It's not like Cassian wants to get anyone in trouble. He'll just - remind people, that food is more important than shoving people into a dress. "I'm sorry you were not given any food before now."
K2 huffs for a third time at her thanks, but he nods too. "I will be back shortly."
Cassian watches him go, listening as he walks down the hall. There was no else stationed outside, and while it's tempting to close the door, propriety reminds him not to and he knows K2 would have a conniption upon return. "He is very overprotective," is what he offers, not apologetic so much as explanatory.
"It's fine," she offers, an an answer to everything. His guard dog, the food, Alderaan itself, it's fine. She's obviously had worse. On the scale of things, it's not that bad.
She's probably not lying. If she's unused to eating, of course she wouldn't be hungry. It doesn't stop him from worrying anyway.
"You still need to eat something," he says, a little quietly. "It's almost lunch time anyway, and I am sure you'd rather be in here than join anyone else yet."
There's bound to be at least one giant fancy dinner, with Gererra and the Organas and Mon Mothma and probably Draven too.
"I'd prefer not to leave my quarters at all." They can force her to marry someone but unless Saw comes in here and throws her over his shoulder -- which he has admittedly done on more than one occasion -- she doesn't think anyone else is going to stomp on propriety enough to manhandle her out of her room if she refuses.
He can relate. Deep down Cassian prefers that sort of quietness too, but he knows how to act in a crowd.
Though it's now the second time Jyn has said she doesn't like people and it shouldn't make him want to smile. Fortunately he does stamp it (mostly) down. "You can take most of your meals in here, but at the very least we will probably both have to be there when they announce the engagement later."
But he gets the sense he'll be handling most of the public parts about this on his own. It's a little disheartening, but he can't say he blames her.
"It's going to be offensively elaborate, isn't it?" There are people starving in the smaller places crushed by the Empire and they're going to waste necessities on a marriage neither party particularly wants to be part of. The opulance of Alderaan already offends Jyn on a very basic level though her ideas of opulance could be anyone else's idea of simplicity.
She had lived a very spartan lifestyle before now, scrounging for food and places to sleep.
"Not as bad as it could be, but I imagine all members of the Alliance currently in Alderaan will be there." He pauses. "Bail Organa is a good man. He will find a good balance of what's necessary without going too overboard. On the upfront, it is supposed to be about celebrating us."
Cassian knows very well they aren't celebrating himself and Jyn. These marriages are always about the Rebellion. But at least he knows Bail will be keeping the two of them in mind more than most other people. "It will be dinner, maybe a little dancing. They will probably put us both in new clothes. But you've had a long day - if you say you need to duck out early, no one will question it."
Alderaan is definitely opulent. But Cassian knows they are far more charitable about their wealth than other nations in the Alliance.
Jyn is about the vehemently oppose dancing because no when Cassian mentions more clothes and her head shakes hard enough that a few wayward curls escape her hair. "I am not putting another dress on when this one is perfectly acceptable!" She shakes her head again, firm, there is no way in hell that is happening.
"I saw him, when I was a little girl, after Saw found me." Her eyes cloud as they always do when she thinks about Saw pulling her out of the cave on Lah'mu. "He used to let me watch holovideos, since I didn't have a teacher, and I watched the last Senate hearings." Before there was no Senate. She'd met him properly already, too, but the Senate meetings were what formed her first opinions of the man. "I am sure the party will be fine, I trust you, but I am not changing my clothes again."
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ohnofeelstho2017-06-16 12:11 am
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Which she knows will make that smile probably vanish but oh well. She should really go back and sit with him, but she likes the window and so instead of moving back to him, she moves forward and perches on the window seat, half facing him but still able to look out the window at Alderaan's countryside.
Compromise.
"What are you expecting from this? And don't say nothing. You've been expecting this since you were ten. What do you want from a marriage?"
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Her question hangs in the air for a few moments while he thinks. He appreciates her candor too. Neither of them have any sort of romantic notions, and it helps him deal with it, weirdly.
"I always hoped that at the very least I would have a friend. Someone to have my back."
Which sounds a little silly to admit aloud. But it's not like Cassian has a lot of real friends. K2 is the guard he doesn't need, and they're friendly, but it always felt like something born more out of an obligation.
But if he needed to marry for politics, he always wanted to get along with his spouse. "What would you want?"
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More wishful thinking than the idea of marrying for love if she's honest.
"When we were in hiding Mama didn't care about titles or... anything. Saw didn't have very many rules. I was on my own for five years." After a moment her mouth turns down into a frown, almost a pout, eyebrows knitting together before she breathes out a laugh sharpened with lingering bitterness. "Six. Six years. I forgot my birthday."
She takes a deep breath, pushes it out slowly. "Anyway, it's irrelevant." Irrelevant when it's what she wants, but not when it comes to Cassian's wants. His at least are attainable. "I can try to be your friend."
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Her idea of few rules and shucking manners is, if he's honest, kind of appealing. "No, not irrelevant. We don't stop having these wants just because we've had some choices taken away."
'Some choices' is a mild way of putting a marriage, but he digresses. "You may have noticed Alderaan breathes the regalia. Fest is not this way. You will have more breathing room there than here."
He sighs a little. When they get to Fest, she'll know more about what he does too. "It may be easier on us both, if we tried to be friends."
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SHE SEES YOU, THERE.
"Will you come sit with me?" Jyn knows how to make privacy. Her spot is the farthest from the door and the side she stretches forward to pat is half obscured but the thick, opulent curtains.
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Cassian exhales. He didn't forget K2 was probably out there, but sometimes it's nice to pretend he does leave. "K2 is - an unusual case." Though it's definitely not helping him convince her Fest is different from Alderaan.
Something in her tone has him glancing at the couch, and he notices the privacy of it. He doesn't know if he should be suspicious or curious, or both. He nods anyway, climbing to his feet. "If you wish."
He sits neatly at the side she gestured towards, shooting her a more curious than suspicious look.
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She doesn't draw her legs back to her side and she's tempted to see how far she can push him when it comes to impropriety before he will push back. Instead she stretches her legs further, pressing her (freezing) toes against his thigh.
"Will you tell me more about Fest?" Not as cold as Hoth and snowy doesn't really say much and she's a curious creature by nature, she wants to know more about where she is saying, but she also wants to know more about where this Captain Prince is from. Even if it's in name only, she'll still be Fest's princess once they're married.
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"It's very small. Strategically important to the Alliance, but not a powerhouse. Our military is - also small." And primarily focused on intelligence, but he will get to that later, probably. It feels weird to talk about to a stranger, even if it's a stranger he's going to marry. "Most people are bilingual, you won't have any issues communicating."
He assumes she doesn't speak Festian. Not when she doesn't even know much about it yet.
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"I can learn, though nothing you said is anything that really interests me." She doesn't care about strategic importance to the Alliance, that is what got her into this mess in the first place. She doesn't want to care about strategy or militaries anymore, she'd left that behind when it had left her behind.
"What are the people like? What do you do for fun, what sort of animals live there, are there plants that somehow survive the harsh weather, what is the food like?" Her expression doesn't soften, but her semi-permanent frown seems less somber. "I want to know about life on Fest."
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No one ever really asks him about the people. It's usually about geography, about strategy, about Fest's resources. It's a burst of curiosity out of her that makes the air feel a little lighter, makes them both seem a little less grumpy.
"Is there a question I should answer first?" It's not quite teasing, but maybe it is. He looks over at her staring at the window. "There probably isn't a day that goes by when you will not see at least one person sledding. I could say it was only children, but that would be a lie. The food can be very spicy. Fest imports a lot of hot peppers. The snow makes it difficult to grow for ourselves, but it doesn't stop greenhouses from trying. Everyone always says we like our food to be so hot because it never quite stops being cold."
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Spicy food for the warmth is an almost sweet idea. She can imagine parents making their children hot foods when they bound in from sledding, shaking snow off their clothes. Wrea was admittedly chilly, but it didn't know as long as Jyn had been on the craggy island.
Maybe it was too close to the water?
"I'm afraid I don't know what sledding is?" She doesn't want to tell him she's not sure she can handle spicy food but she subsisted off prison sludge for so many months she's not sure she can handle any food right now. Actually... "Do you think it would be an abuse of my power to have food brought here?"
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Cassian blinks a few times, because how could she not know what sledding is but - it's stupid to belittle her for it. She's never seen real snow before, it makes sense. "You slide on the snow. Sleds can be virtually anything from a thin metal sheet, to a wooden one, to something elevated on bars -" He makes a face, because describing sleds is weird, "- there's all kinds. You sit on them to slide down snow hills."
Now he wants to go sledding. He hasn't been in years.
"Brought to this room, you mean?"
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"Yes, to this room." Her nose crinkles a little. "I suppose I could go to the food, if that's easier. I don't relish walking around looking done up like some kind of bloody snow princess though."
As if she is not... a princess...
LOOK. She prefers pants. She doesn't want to put shoes on. She especially doesn't want to put shoes on that match this absurd dress because she can only imagine how uncomfortable they will be.
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He is not looking forward to the fancy dress for the next few days either.
"We can probably call for something, if you don't want to walk like this. Do you have a favorite thing to eat? K2 can probably go get it, if you'd rather."
The real point of that option is to get rid of the watchdog for a little while, but if she'd rather go to the kitchens herself, that's fine too. He gets the sense she's savvy enough to pick up on the choices.
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"I haven't eaten since..." Her eyebrows knit together which is enough of an answer that it has been too long. "Prison doesn't particularly care about getting dinner to you on time."
Someone probably should have noticed when they were shoving her into this ridiculous get up, as a joke apparently!, but no one had offered and Jyn had been too pissed off to really notice until now -- when she is calm. The calm doesn't lessen how uncomfortable she feels admitting anything from prison, however, even if it makes her mildly grateful the women had chosen long sleeves for her.
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Within seconds the door opens and K2 walks in, looking huffy and as though he's trying very hard not to cross his arms. "I heard," he says with more huff, and Cassian is fairly sure he's going to blow himself away.
"Two, please. Something mild with vegetables for now. I'll make it up to you."
While something like chicken or beef would probably be far better, he's sure Jyn's stomach will appreciate being eased back into real food more slowly.
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want Cassian to make that face.
She looks away from the window finally, studying K2. "Thank you." Man, he does not like her.
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K2 huffs for a third time at her thanks, but he nods too. "I will be back shortly."
Cassian watches him go, listening as he walks down the hall. There was no else stationed outside, and while it's tempting to close the door, propriety reminds him not to and he knows K2 would have a conniption upon return. "He is very overprotective," is what he offers, not apologetic so much as explanatory.
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Her gaze drifts back to the window.
"I'm not... I'm not that hungry anyway."
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"You still need to eat something," he says, a little quietly. "It's almost lunch time anyway, and I am sure you'd rather be in here than join anyone else yet."
There's bound to be at least one giant fancy dinner, with Gererra and the Organas and Mon Mothma and probably Draven too.
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"I don't like people."
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Though it's now the second time Jyn has said she doesn't like people and it shouldn't make him want to smile. Fortunately he does stamp it (mostly) down. "You can take most of your meals in here, but at the very least we will probably both have to be there when they announce the engagement later."
But he gets the sense he'll be handling most of the public parts about this on his own. It's a little disheartening, but he can't say he blames her.
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"It's going to be offensively elaborate, isn't it?" There are people starving in the smaller places crushed by the Empire and they're going to waste necessities on a marriage neither party particularly wants to be part of. The opulance of Alderaan already offends Jyn on a very basic level though her ideas of opulance could be anyone else's idea of simplicity.
She had lived a very spartan lifestyle before now, scrounging for food and places to sleep.
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Cassian knows very well they aren't celebrating himself and Jyn. These marriages are always about the Rebellion. But at least he knows Bail will be keeping the two of them in mind more than most other people. "It will be dinner, maybe a little dancing. They will probably put us both in new clothes. But you've had a long day - if you say you need to duck out early, no one will question it."
Alderaan is definitely opulent. But Cassian knows they are far more charitable about their wealth than other nations in the Alliance.
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"I saw him, when I was a little girl, after Saw found me." Her eyes cloud as they always do when she thinks about Saw pulling her out of the cave on Lah'mu. "He used to let me watch holovideos, since I didn't have a teacher, and I watched the last Senate hearings." Before there was no Senate. She'd met him properly already, too, but the Senate meetings were what formed her first opinions of the man. "I am sure the party will be fine, I trust you, but I am not changing my clothes again."
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